Personal Development

Should I Text Him? 17 Rules You Need to Know

Are you caught in a texting dilemma? 

Do you need to hit that ‘send’ button, however you’re uncertain if it’s the best transfer? 

Texting may be tough; what when you come off as too keen or, worse, needy? 

Well, haven’t any concern as a result of we’ve bought all of the solutions you want.

In this publish, we’ll cowl some guidelines to assist you determine when you must and shouldn’t textual content him. 

So in case your thumbs are itching to kind one thing out – learn on!

You’ll by no means have a look at texting the identical once more.

Is It Bad to Text a Guy First?

“Should I text him first, or should I wait for him to text me?” 

Is it dangerous to textual content a man first? 

It’s completely OK to textual content a man first! In truth, generally texting him first is the best transfer. It all depends upon the state of affairs and your relationship with him.

When is it okay to textual content him first?

  • When you genuinely want one thing.
  • To ask him out on a date.
  • If you haven’t heard from him shortly and need to guarantee all the pieces’s OK.
  • After your first date, when you two had an awesome connection and left on good phrases.

When Is it Not Okay to Text Him First?

  • After a protracted interval of silence.
  • If he has handled you poorly up to now.
  • To ask a query that would simply wait till one other day.
  • When you’re always sending him messages, and he hasn’t responded to any of them.
  • If it’s one thing which you could talk about in particular person.
  • After a primary date, when you two had a mediocre to dangerous connection and left on awkward phrases.

If you’re simply getting to know one another, then it may very well be seen as too keen or determined to provoke contact earlier than he does

Should I Text Him? 17 Rules You Need to Know

“Who should text first, him or me?” This is a standard dilemma that many ladies face. Unfortunately, the reply isn’t so black and white.

There are sure conditions the place it’s okay to textual content him first and others the place you must watch for him to textual content you.

So how have you learnt the distinction?

Don’t Text Him Rules

1. Don’t Text Him When You’re Drunk

Drunk texts are sometimes embarrassing and regretful and don’t all the time ship the message you meant.

That’s as a result of alcohol impairs your skill to suppose clearly, in addition to your judgment and decision-making abilities.

When intoxicated, it may be simple to make errors or write one thing that you just would possibly later remorse, which might lead to harm emotions, misunderstandings, and pointless drama. Additionally, alcohol lowers your inhibitions, making it extra seemingly for you to write one thing inappropriate or offensive.

Sending a message whereas drunk can even give the opposite particular person the flawed impression of you, particularly when you don’t know one another effectively.

2. Don’t Text Him When You’re Angry

Are you pissed off with him for not texting you again after your date? Or possibly he mentioned one thing that upset you the final time you frolicked.

In any case, don’t textual content him when you’re indignant. It’s by no means a good suggestion to hit ship when your feelings run excessive.

You will seemingly fill your message with accusations and hurtful phrases, which might do extra hurt than good and worsen the state of affairs. It’s additionally attainable that he gained’t perceive why you’re upset, which may lead to additional misunderstandings.

3. Don’t Text Him within the Middle of the Night

Who likes being woken up in the midst of the night time by the ding of a textual content message? No one!

That’s why it’s greatest to keep away from texting somebody in the midst of the night time until it’s an pressing state of affairs. And even in an emergency, suppose twice earlier than sending that message.

Could it wait til the morning? If it will possibly’t, can this emergency be dealt with by another person?

If you don’t know him that effectively, don’t textual content him late at night time, it might make him uncomfortable and can almost definitely go away a foul impression.

4. Don’t Text Him Too Much

If you don’t know him effectively or your relationship continues to be in its early levels, don’t bombard him with messages. It will likely be annoying and put plenty of strain on him and make him really feel like he has to reply to all of your messages.

Sending a couple of message at a time makes you look too keen or determined, which is usually a main turnoff.

So don’t textual content him too typically, and don’t ship lengthy conversations in a single message. Keep your texts brief, candy, and to the purpose.

5. Don’t Text Him First After a First Date if He Said He Will Text You

We’ve all gotten the “I’ll call or text you” line after a primary date. Sometimes, this line is real, and different occasions it’s only a well mannered approach of claiming goodbye, particularly if the date didn’t go effectively.

If he mentioned he’ll textual content you, don’t break that unstated rule by texting him first. Wait for him to make a transfer. If it doesn’t occur inside a couple of days, don’t hand over hope; generally, persons are busy, or they merely don’t know what to say after a date.

But if he hasn’t contacted you after a number of days, don’t hesitate to take the initiative and ship him a message. Rule of thumb: don’t textual content him till after three days. That approach, you don’t appear too keen or determined.

6. Don’t Text Him If You’re Looking for Validation

If you don’t be ok with your self and also you’re searching for reassurance from him, keep away from your cellphone! 

Relying on another person to make you’re feeling higher about your self is an indication of low vanity.

It’s additionally manipulative, because it places the opposite particular person in an ungainly place by anticipating them to provide the validation you want.

Instead, give attention to constructing your self-worth, and don’t search for validation from anybody else. You can do that by discovering actions that make you be ok with your self, like understanding or pursuing hobbies.

7. If He Has Ghosted You Before, Don’t Text Him

Going silent is a approach of claiming, “I don’t want to talk to you anymore,” with out really saying something.

It’s a cowardly transfer, and it’s greatest simply to transfer on and never look again. He’s made it clear that he doesn’t need to discuss to you, so don’t trouble attempting once more.

Don’t waste your time attempting to get in contact with somebody who doesn’t even care sufficient to reply. There are loads of different folks on the market who will admire you.

And if he begins texting you once more after ghosting you, don’t be afraid to ask him why he blew you off within the first place. This will show you how to determine whether or not it’s price pursuing a relationship with him or not.

8. Don’t Text Him If He Is an Ex and You Want Closure

Never textual content an ex for closure when you don’t really need to get again collectively. Sending a message will solely give them false hope and go away you feeling extra confused and harm than earlier than.

The greatest approach to transfer on from an ex is by reducing off all contact with them. That means no texting, chatting, and even checking their social media profiles. You shouldn’t even be buddies on Facebook!

It’s time to give attention to your self and don’t let your ex take up any extra of your psychological vitality. Trust us; you don’t want them in your life.

9. Don’t Text Him If He Is Deliberately Pulling Away

We’ve all been there, you actually like this man, after which out of the blue, he begins pulling away from you for no obvious cause. He would possibly inform you he wants area or is just not prepared for a relationship. 

Whatever the explanation, when you don’t need to be caught in an countless cycle of confusion and heartbreak, it’s greatest you don’t textual content him once more. It will solely make issues worse as a result of he’s already attempting to create distance between you. 

If he does contact you, ask him to be sincere about his intentions for the connection. If he can’t offer you a straight reply or if he’s not keen to commit, it’s time to transfer on and discover another person who deserves your love.


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Do Text Him Rules

10. Only Text Him If You Genuinely Need Something

If you need help with something, don’t hesitate to reach out and text him. Whether it’s a question about a project or advice on how to handle a difficult situation, don’t be afraid to ask for help.

Just don’t make a habit of leaning on him for everything – it will make your relationship one-sided, and he won’t feel appreciated. It also signals that you don’t trust yourself to make decisions on your own.

11. Text Him If You Want To Make Plans

It’s totally ok to take the initiative and text him if you want to get together, hang out, or go out on a date. Initiating conversation is also a good way to show him that you’re interested and don’t have to wait for him to make the first move.

However, be careful not to give off a desperate vibe. If he doesn’t show interest, don’t keep texting him relentlessly; simply move on and don’t take it personally.

girl in bed using phone should I text him

12. Text Him First If You Two Are Already in a Relationship 

In an established relationship, feel free to text him first if you want to hang out or just say hi. This will show him that you don’t take your relationship for granted and don’t expect him always to be the one initiating conversations.

And don’t be afraid to be a bit flirty! Texting can be a great way to keep the spark alive and remind your partner why they chose you in the first place. It also shows that you don’t take your relationship for granted.

13. Text Him If You Have an Important Issue to Discuss

If something important needs to be addressed, don’t hesitate to text him and let him know what’s on your mind. Don’t hesitate to reach out, whether it’s a personal issue or a work-related matter.

Having a conversation over text can prevent misunderstandings, clarify things, and help you both reach an agreement. It also helps you have difficult conversations without the added pressure of having to look him in the eye.

14. Text Him If You Want To Apologize

Have you done something wrong? Text him and apologize. A sincere apology can go a long way in repairing any damage you might have done to your relationship. 

It’s essential to address the issue as soon as possible and don’t wait too long before you reach out because it can show a lack of respect and understanding on your part. 

Be humble and don’t make excuses, don’t be afraid to admit when you’re wrong and don’t let your ego get in the way.

15. Text Him If He Is Going Through Something Difficult

We all have our difficult days, so don’t hesitate to text him if he’s going through a rough patch and offer your support. It can be as simple as saying you’re there for him if he needs to talk or just reminding him that better days will come soon.

It’s a kind gesture and will show him that you don’t take your relationship for granted. He’ll appreciate it, and it might just remind him to get back on track.

16. Text Him If You Miss Him

If you miss your guy and want to let him know, don’t hesitate to text him! 

A simple “I miss you” message can turn his day around. It’s a small gesture that will make him feel appreciated and remind him of why he likes you in the first place.

Just don’t overdo it – don’t send too many messages, and don’t make it into a habit of relying on your guy to make you feel better.

17. Text Him If You Have Something Exciting to Share

Got some exciting news?  Text him, and don’t be afraid to brag a little bit. Whether you got that job promotion you’ve been chasing or finally achieved something you’ve been working towards, don’t hesitate to share the news with your guy.

hand holding a phone should I text him

He’ll appreciate it, and being part of your success will make him feel proud. Plus, it’s an opportunity to celebrate together and enjoy a little victory.

How to Not Text Him When I Shouldn’t

We’ve discussed when it’s okay to text him and when it’s not, but how do you stop yourself from sending a text when you know it’s not a good idea? We know it can be hard when you’re aching to hear from him.

But you need to maintain your classiness and confidence, girlfriend. Here are some tips to help you stay strong.

  • Walk away from your phone: The best way to avoid texting him is to stay away from your phone in the first place. If it’s not around, you don’t have to worry about hitting ‘send’!
  • Change his name on your phone: If you don’t want to delete his contact, try changing his name on your phone. Renaming him something like “Do Not Text” or “Wait Until He Texts First” will be a great reminder of when NOT to hit that send button.
  • Think of the consequences: Take a minute to think about the consequences of sending him a text – will it positively impact your relationship? Or could things get worse if you don’t wait for him to text first?
  • Talk to someone: Have a conversation with your friend or family member about why you are having trouble following the rule of not texting him when it’s inappropriate. They can provide valuable advice that will help you break this unhelpful habit.
  • Find a distraction: Distraction is always your friend when resisting an impulse. Find something else to do to take your mind off the urge to text him. From going for a run to working on a project – take it one step at a time, and you’ll get there.
  • Be honest with yourself: Pay attention to how often he initiates contact compared to you. If the balance is tipped in your favor, take a step back and don’t text him for a while. This will give him space to miss you and think of you.

Final Thoughts

Texting can be a great way to stay connected with someone, but knowing when it’s appropriate is vital. 

Just remember – if you’re in doubt, the best thing to do is just ask yourself: “Would I want to receive this message?!” or  “Will this message positively impact our relationship?”

If the answer is no, then it’s probably best not to send it. By following these 17 rules, you’ll be sure to navigate texting with your guy like a pro!  Good luck!

How do I know if should I text him? In this post, find out the rules of when to and when not to text a guy first.

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